He's Not Just There To Put a Baby In You and Bring Home The Cash

Men, although powerful and often rule the professional world, get pushed aside when it comes to family and home matters. In the media Men are always the joke. The big dummies or idiots of the family. The fall down stairs and make stupid mistakes all for the comedic relief. When women are getting married it's not really a joint thing anymore is it? It is the women's day and their day only. Little girls grow up planning their wedding. They just need a plastic ken doll to stand in for the magical day. Also when the first baby is born. The mother is their 2nd in command and the man “just doesn’t understand!”

For all this I kind of feel bad for them. Do we really discredit them so much? How could we distrust them so much with the children? With practical tasks? With the things that seem so important? Today in class we talked about the stresses that families with new children struggle with and for the most part it seems like the dad gets the short end of the stick. For me to say that is saying something too because childbirth? Come on. That's the shortest end of the stick you can get. Although we get the privilege to create life doesn’t mean we should exclude men from the process.

There is so much growth and happiness a man can experience if he were to be included in certain events we typically don’t deem “manly”. Planning a wedding isn’t just for the women. It's important for the man to get involved too because it helps the couple. You aren’t just planning a wedding together. You are planning a marriage. You learn how to make financial decisions together. You learn how to problem solve with each other. You find out how your partner acts like when put under stress. Putting all the wedding preparations on the women sets an unfortunate precedent for marriage. It doesn’t seem like it would affect anything into marriage but it does and it will create problems maybe minor ones but they will be there. All the stages of a relationship are predictors of a future marriage. The good and bad.

Another thing that can be really harmful to the father is being discluded from the pregnancy process and ultimate child birth. Women tend to fall to their mothers (sisters, girlfriends, etc.) when first being pregnant. They can be scared and want to get reassurance or they want advice. They are looking up to someone who's already been through this big life changing moment. Men can never experience this big life changing moment. Of course they get the results of it but they won't ever get to experience it. If the wife suddenly starts pulling away from her husband and starts relying on other people... you can imagine how upsetting this is starting to sound. Pregnancy and childbirth are some of the biggest opportunities to grow closer to your significant other! So many people don't understand the impact this time of life can have on forever. If we let our males in more on the "feminine" parts of life we can create so much stronger relationships. They will feel appreciated and included! They may even get more excited about fatherhood. They will understand the process more and can become more empathetic.

Men get a bad rep. Sometimes they deserve it. Sometimes. We don't realize how much we need them. We forget about the balance. Men can be the rocks of our lives. They provide comfort and safety. They provide us with love and affection and they can be a source of such joy. We should let them in more into the more difficult parts of life. Letting them help us will only make things better. We should give them the opportunity to be the men we want them to be. The fathers we want them to be and the husbands we want them to be.