Why Bother With That Crazy Thing Called Parenting?

Look, there are a bunch of ways to do parenting. There are so many methods and self-help books on it. So many opinions and voices telling you the way to parent your kids. So who’s right? Who actually knows what's going on? Nobody. And everybody. 

There are a bunch of ways to do it right and a bunch of ways to do it wrong. Everybody is a little messed up from their childhood no matter how good and how bad you were because here’s a secret. Nobody’s perfect! Isn’t that great? That means that no parent is perfect either! We all make mistakes and that's okay! Of course there are better ways to do things and we should always be striving for betterness. Our kids are/will be some of the most important things in our lives and of course we want them to turn out okay and to be okay.  So why do we parent? Why do strive to do the best? Many reasons but a few are because we want to protect our children. Not only protect but we want to prepare our children for the world so that they can do the best they can. If this is sounding familiar than you’re right! Michael Popkin said that the purpose of parenting is “To protect and prepare a child to survive and to thrive in the world they are going to live in.” 

First off, Protection. When we take on the task of raising a human life we have a responsibility to protect them from the dangers of this world. Every human being has rights. I think every child has a right to be protected. They don’t always get that need fulfilled and some really bad things can happen to those unfortunate children. There are so many dangers in this world. Dangerous people that have mal Intent. Dangerous situations with irreversible conditions. Dangerous media that can be consumed without parental supervision or knowledge. It's crucial to know of the certain situations that your child is exposed to and how they can affect that child. We want our children to be safe so we need to be aware of what they are experiencing so that we can protect them. On that same vein we shouldn’t be overprotective either. Overprotectiveness isn’t helpful for the child. It creates a bubble of naivete that can very negatively affect your child as they grow into adulthood. We have to allow our children to have experiences so that they can learn and understand from them. This kind of leads into the next point Popkins makes.

To prepare our children for the world they are going to live in we have to actually let them live their lives. Experiences aren’t necessarily bad for your children. Making mistakes isn’t bad either. Children need to learn from their experiences and mistakes in order to grow! We have to be consistent with our rules and boundaries so that our children can flourish. Something that was said in class that I think is really profound is “Children push boundaries to see where they are”. Children thrive in family dynamics that have firm boundaries. Not to firm and not to loose. They need structure and discipline but fun times and and wholesome recreational activities as well. They need balance. We need to give them responsibilities so that they can learn the ability to respond well to things. 

The last part is about them thriving in the world they live in.  I think this part is important to note because as parents you grow up in a different world than your kids will. I was born in the year 2000. Half of my childhood was right before the technology boom and the other half was when technology started going crazy. My parents didn’t experience anything like this when they were kids and they had to learn how to parent teenagers in a world where technology was so new and misunderstood. We grew up in different worlds but they realized that and tried their best to adapt their parenting to the world as it changed.

So there you go. Parenting is a big responsibility and even though there are lots of ways to do it wrong, there are lots of ways to do it right as well. We just need to remember what’s important; The kids. We should all always be striving to do our best so our children can have the best. You will make mistakes but as long as you know the purpose of why you are doing this crazy impossible thing it will make it a little more bearable.